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WASHINGTON -- The Alliance to Save Energy Killer Watts (presented by Sign of the WhaleTM) scored their the first walk-off victory in franchise history Monday night, plating a run in the bottom of the ninth inning against the American Rivers Fighting Green Weasels for a 6-5 win that broke the teams’ first place tie and secured the Heads Division title of the Environmental Non-Profit League.
With runners on first and third and one out, outfielder Jake “Rappin’ Shaq” Repanshek singled to left to drive home third basemen Paul “Pull Hitter” Karrer in the second extra frame after seven innings of regulation softball. The game-winning hit broke a long, late-inning scoring drought between the two teams after the Watts plated four in the first, but managed only one more until Repanshek’s heroics. Said shortstop Sean “I Can’t Believe I Ate the Whole Thing” Garcia: “That was a real clutch hit, completely overshadowing the one I delivered right before him…that jerk….”
The Watts’ uncanny defensive tricks were the real story of the day, snuffing out multiple Weasel scoring chances. Outfielder Joe “Intern X” Teng came flying in to snag a high fly ball over right fielder David “The” Mann’s glove in the seventh inning, saving two runs going into the final frame of regulation. With the bases loaded in the eighth, Karrer fielded a short ground ball at third and threw home, barely beating the runner for a key force out thanks to a deft catch by infielder Jess “Sparkplug” Molina. In perhaps the most unlikely play in Watts history, the hometown favorites got out of another bases loaded jam in the top of the ninth. With two outs, a Weasels hitter dribbled a ball through pitcher Holly “Dogtown” Seeloff’s (6-2) legs to second baseman Emily “Lancaster Westside” Curley, who tossed the ball to charging shortstop Garcia, only to find him nowhere near the second base bag. Fortunately for the Watts, Garcia added to his highlight reel of defensive web gems by instantly firing the ball to first baseman Paul “Nickname Withheld” Bostrom, just in time to beat the slow-running Weasel hitter for the third out, completing the unlikely 1-4-6-3 putout and preserving the 5-5 tie.
At 10-2 on the year with one game remaining, the Watts have clinched first place in their division, owning all tiebreakers in the event of a loss next week. The Watts close out the regular season on Monday, July 20 against the bottom-dwelling Pew Environmental Trust Tree Sluggers. First pitch is set for 6:19pm.
NOTES: Unseen Watts veteran Steve Capanna has reportedly notched his own “walk off” victory, earning first place in a contest of runway struts and poses against former top models Derek Zoolander and Hansel. The walk off was held in an abandoned, yet surprisingly well-lit Brooklyn warehouse and was officiated by 1930s-era Baseball Hall of Famer David Bowie. Capanna’s return to modeling remains uncertain.
Inning 123 456 789 Final
Weasels (8-3) 210 200 000 5
Killer Watts (10-2) 400 010 001 6
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